The Vermin returns to Fredericksburg, AKA Dakota Slim, AKA Dakota Fritz, AKA Indian Pete, AKA Peyote Pete, John Smallberries, John Yaya, John Bigbootie and rattlesnake Red.Wanted for using harsh language, farting in church and irregular bathing. Do not try to apprehend. Contact local Gillespie County authorities.
Whereabouts of this creature are unknown, but local authorities are offering a seven dollar reward for his fumigation and release into the wild.
Except for all the Wanted posters and blood stains, my return to Fredericksburg has gone well. As a disguise, I shaved my head. No one I know can recognize me now. Stay tuned to the next exciting episode of, “The Vermin Speaks.”