The Neighbor’s Truck


My neighbor has his truck for sale. He says he lost the key but you can start it with your pocket knife. The tires are near bald, but they still hold air if you pump them up, or at least they did a few years ago. Ain’t no hood, but it helps with the cooling. No windshield, but that also helps with the cooling, and no need for wipers. The seat’s a bit chewed up by the mice and rats, but a burlap sack covers it right up. It burns a little oil, but only about a quart every couple hundred miles. The dents don’t get in the way of the wheels turning or the doors closing, except for the driver’s door, but a hunk of rope takes care of that, and you can climb in the passenger side. It don’t need no paint. That’s a patina. Don’t touch it and it’ll last another hundred years. It’ll start nearly every other time, if you have a battery, and go for ten miles or more, if it ain’t too hot. The pickup bed is around back, if you want that, too. There’s no title, but you don’t need no title out here, and no plates. So, money saved is money you can spend on beer. Oh, sorry.

Sounds pretty good to me. What do you think I should offer? He seemed like a pretty shrewd character for a desert prospector and professional alcoholic.

Such is life here in the South. Somewhere, this story is true; probably more than once! At least the photos are real and taken by me. I hope my followers will enjoy my continuing adventures with just a tiny bit of artistic license and slight bits of imagination, I mean, exaggeration, or just plain foolishness.

So, if you’ve read this far and had a few chuckles, please share this with your friends. I’d really like to keep you and your friends chuckling and laughing and giving you something fun/funny to share with more friends. It may seem strange that I have German heritage on both sides of my family and like to talk about the life in  the southwest, but let me assure you, I have many ways to make you laugh, if you will cooperate! Oh, sorry.

Next post: How to make armadillo taste like chicken.

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